It’s no secret that teasing is a natural part of life for kids. But when teasing goes too far, it’s difficult for your child to differentiate between mean words and playful banter. The temperament and personality style of the receiver is a major factor in the equation, according to Dr. Fran Walfish, child psychotherapist and author of “The Self-Aware Parent.” “If the receiver is an exquisitely sensitive person, he or she may feel deeply injured by innocent teasing,” Walfish said. Teaching your child to assess teasing and address the behavior on his own can shape his ability to handle conflict in social situations.
Category: Feature Stories
The School Year: Riding the Emotional Roller Coaster
When Christine Hammond picked up her first-grade daughter from school one day, she sensed that something was wrong. Her suspicions were confirmed when her daughter cried uncontrollably for 20 minutes while sitting in the car. As a concerned parent of three, Hammond patiently waited for her child to reveal that she did not earn a sticker for the week because she talked out of turn in the classroom. “Our son, the oldest, attempted to comfort her by telling her that it was OK because he never earned a sticker in all his years of school,” said Hammond, a registered mental health counseling intern and educator. Her daughter’s crying quickly turned to laughter at her brother’s remark. “No two kids are the same,” Hammond said. “So, just because one is upset, it does not mean the other will be upset over the same issue.” As a parent, you can easily recognize when your child is angry, hurt or even sleepy from a busy day. Your child, though, is not always able to recognize, absorb and accept his feelings. Fostering his ability to recognize and understand his emotions can help him succeed in school, make and maintain friendships, and even grow closer to the entire family. Read the rest of the story here - Shannon Philpott
The World of Parents and Their Tweens
The tween years can be an exciting yet treacherous time for a child. Beyond an increased awareness of physical and emotional changes, these 8- to 12-year-olds clinging to childlike innocence are pushed into the world of adolescence. "Around these years, children begin to become increasingly self-conscious, and this often drives social difficulties that did not exist in their lives before," said Dr. John Duffy, a Chicago-based clinical psychologist. "Of course, pushing the boundaries of freedoms and exhibiting new attitudes also arise during these years." Even though the tween years can test the strength and patience of the child and parent, it doesn't have to result in a game of survival. The key to a healthy parent-tween relationship relies on a clear understanding of boundaries and the struggles and freedoms the tween is now facing on a daily basis.
Going it Alone: Overcoming the Challenges of Single Parenting
At times, it may seem like it takes a village to raise a child, but for single parents, that village often feels like a party of one. Single parenting poses challenges for even the most organized mom or dad, and without an extra hand, it can seem like a daunting task.
Navigating After-School Care
In a society where it's common for both Mom and Dad to work outside the home, the typical 9-to-5 schedule doesn't afford many parents the luxury of picking up their children from school.
Beating the Back-to-School Blues
Although the sun is shining bright and summertime is a fresh reality for your child, many schools are ramping up for school sessions to begin in mid-August. At a time when your child is still focused on sleeping in late, hanging out at the pool with friends and camping in the backyard, the thought of returning to school can spark anxiety, fear and the back-to-school blues. Transition times are unsettling for the entire family, notes Anne Maxwell, a Colorado-based family therapist. "Even if the transition is to a known experience or event, it is a time of stress," Maxwell said. Many children respond to changes in routine by acting out, refusing to adopt a routine or withdrawing emotionally. As a parent, it's often a challenge to get your child into a school routine and keep the household positive despite the looming back to school thoughts and activities. Read the Rest of the Article Here
When You’re the New Stepparent of a Teenager
Published July 2011: ParentUSACity.com When You're the New Stepparent of a Teenager Article Excerpt: Finding the perfect mix for a blended family takes time. Just as it takes time to warm up to a new friend or neighbor, stepchildren need time to absorb the changes in the family and to evaluate how to approach relationships. And when the stepchild is a teen, an extra set of challenges comes into play. According to Patricia Schell Kuhlman, a counselor with special interest in attachment and bonding, relationships with an outside parent are complicated at any age. With teens, she says, “Going through the initial immersion stage with adolescent stepchildren is very challenging because their normal development needs for separation and independence from the family are in conflict with the need of the stepfamily to form new family bonds and relationships.” An instantaneous bond may not happen, especially when a teen feels resentment toward parents and stepparents following a divorce or death. Therefore, the relationship must develop with input from both the teen and stepparent. Learning how to navigate the challenges requires patience and flexibility from both sides. Read the rest of the story here. - Shannon Philpott
Allowing Allowance
Allowing Allowance Teaching Children Responsibility One Dollar at a Time Article Excerpt: When Danny Payne was a child, he would go to the store with his parents and find a toy he just had to have. Although many parents give in and fork over the cash to please their children, Payne's parents reminded him of the long list of chores posted on the fridge that would allow him to earn the money to buy the toy. "I can remember that mowing the lawn paid $1.25, which I'm sure violated child labor laws because our Midwest lawn was huge," said Payne, a California-based certified financial planner. After a week or two of mowing the lawn and checking off chores on that list, Payne began to value his earnings and decided that the toy he just had to have wasn't necessarily worth the money. Payne learned a valuable lesson about managing his finances and prioritizing his wants and needs.
Destination: Mom-Cation
A mom often spends her days tripping over action figures, soothing her infant's emerging teeth and defusing the tantrums of a toddler. Exhaustion sets in, and, with a little luck, she may get a few hours of uninterrupted sleep. to bless her tired bones. The fast-paced life of a mother can run down even the most fit and healthy mom if she doesn't make time for herself. Ramani Durvasula, a Los Angeles-based family therapist and mother, notes that mothering has turned into a competitive sport in our society. The result is burnout and "suboptimal" mothering.
Finding the Perfect Mix for a Blended Family
Published April 2011: eHow Family & Relationships Finding the Perfect Mix for a Blended Family How to Achieve Harmony While Embracing Differences Article Excerpt: When Cherie and Steve Miller married 10 years ago, they knew it would be a challenge merging their existing families. Cherie had three sons, ages 12, 18 and 20, and Steve… Continue reading Finding the Perfect Mix for a Blended Family
Shannon Philpott-Sanders 