Published April 2011: eHow Family & Relationships
Preparing for a Proposal
Get Ready, Get Set, Propose?
Before Susanne Alexander said “I do,” she thought a lot about what she would do as a wife. But she didn’t do it alone. She and her future husband evaluated their health, finances and family plans together to ensure they could successfully pull off a long-term marriage commitment.
It took planning to get it right.
“We began as friends, built a romantic relationship, prayed together and talked through many topics together along the way,” said Alexander, a relationship coach and author of “All-In-One Marriage Prep.”
“We spent time writing down what we wanted a marriage to look like to ensure we had similar visions,” she said. And then, he proposed.
Couples often envision living happily ever after once one or the other pops the question, but in reality, planning and evaluating your compatibility and emotional readiness for marriage is crucial before the proposal.
Know Yourself, Know Your Partner
Most couples are fully aware that a marriage proposal can be a life-changing event. But sometimes the rush of being in love causes even the most logical person to enter into a commitment with blinders on, unaware of the potential stress involved.
In preparing for the proposal, the adage “To Thine Own Self Be True” is key, said Karol Ward, author and New York City-based psychotherapist. “If the persons involved in the proposing and receiving of the proposal are not in touch with what really matters to them — their bottom lines in relationships — then the potential for regret is down the road,” Ward said.
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