Published August 2010: ParentUSAcity.com
Unveiling the Mystery of Romantic Attraction
Why did you fall in love with your spouse instead of with someone else? Though many mysteries surround romantic feelings, current psychology has some insights.
You can strengthen your marriage by understanding the agendas and illusions that lie beneath the glow of romance.
When I think back to the moment I first laid eyes on the love of my life, my memories evoke the romantic nature of our chance meeting. Through my eyes, he was mysterious, gentle-natured, and handsome with those blue eyes that made me melt. He spoke softly and said all the right things. I was immediately attracted to his smile, his intelligence, and his spirit.
According to relationship expert Alisa Bowman, though, that perfect moment may have been an illusion. Bowman, author of Project Happily Ever After Relationship Rules, asserts that couples often begin relationships with blinders on.
“I have a theory that when people meet each other, they see what they want to see,” Bowman said. “You see qualities about yourself within this person and ignore the qualities that are actually different. It’s a stage in a relationship where you really don’t know each other—it’s an illusion.”
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– Shannon Philpott